Friday, December 10, 2010

Body Language


Unless you speak Japanese, the only real language you can actually use if you’re visiting Japan, is your body language. I’ve done pretty well so far miming food, or sleep or partial differential equations. But it doesn’t always work.

I started to get some dandruff, so I went to a big supermarket to get some antidandruff shampoo. It turned out it wasn’t as simple as I thought. My desperate attempts to show some flakes falling from my hair only attracted giggles from some otherwise very helpful shop assistants. Poor girls! I bet they thought I was looking for flea powder for monkeys... Eventually a quick google search solved the problem.

Things got even more interesting when I went to get a haircut. I was greeted by a very nice lady, who was obviously accustomed with more chatty customers. All I could do was smile back and nod every few seconds. Eventually our discussion came down to what I took as “How do you want your hair cut?”. Mime that! “Well”, I said trying my luck, “I like to keep it a bit longer, but not too long...”. After a while, her perplexed look told me I was running out of luck. As she stood there waiting, scissors in one hand and a big hair comb in the other, I realised I had this leaflet in my pocket from a concert I went to the night before. It was all in Japanese, but it had some pictures with several artists. “Here”, I said pointing at one of the pictures. “I want his haircut”. She quickly took the leaflet, put it next to the mirror and started meticulously cutting my hair. Every once in a while she would go back to consult the picture, probably wishing she had a 3D image of the guy, or at least a couple of police photos.

But sometimes, no matter how hard you try, you can’t get by unless you can speak a few words. I’ve eaten something strange earlier this week and I started to feel very sick. I had to go to see a doctor. Now, how do you explain symptoms like vomiting and diarrhoea without the use of language? Well, I couldn’t. And my book of useful Japanese phrases wasn’t of much help either. Eventually they had to find an English speaking doctor, for an ignorant gaijin.

Relief!

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